If I can help somebody while I travel along...with a word or song...Lord my living shall not be in vain...

I went for the funeral service of an elderly acquaintance of mine today. His name was Derek and we went to the same church. He was in his mid-eighties and was truly one of the nicest, warmest people I've come across in my life. He gave the biggest hugs and he had this huge smile that lit up his face. Every Sunday I was guaranteed at least a minimum of 2 hugs and lots of smiles.

As I sat in church today listening to people's memories about him, my emotions as could be expected veered between sadness and laughter, but I also felt regret. Regret for not taking the opportunity to get to know him better because he took the time out every sunday to seek me out and say hello, to ask after my health, my family and life in general. I regret not making more of an effort to seek him out especially this last year when he was poorly, to let him know I appreciated his kindness, his warmth and his endeavours to always make me feel welcome and comfortable. I especially regret missing the last church lunch he invited me to as his date. One of the last times I saw him was on a tuesday outside the supermarket across the road from church and Derek spied me, came over and asked that I follow him to the church coffee morning he was on his way to...unfortunately I couldn't go because I had pilates and we laughed about that, I promised to attend the next coffee morning but of course I didn't.

Derek wasn't just kind to me, he was kind to everybody. My mama got a hug as well but mine he laughingly always made sure was always more special. If she got a handshake, I got a hug. If she got a hug, I got a hug and a peck on the cheek. That's just how he was, charming and funny, with everybody. The memories in church today were poignant but beautiful. They spoke about a man who lived his faith, he selflessly gave of himself time and time again, visiting the sick, volunteering his time and car as transportation etc. They spoke of a man I would love to know, to learn from; a man I could have known and learnt from if only I had seen beyond my self and my world.

I am glad and thankful that I met him and knew him, even if only as an acquaintance, even if only a little, because that little was enough in it's own way.

Seeing him always put a smile on my face and as I remember you today Derek, I remember you with a smile on my face. I will miss your hugs and I pray that your soul may rest in perfect peace.


P.S - My title is from an old Mahalia Jackson gospel song. Words are simple and to the point. If you've never checked out Mahalia Jackson, please do so, especially if you like gospel music...traditional gospel. I love her rendition of the hymn 'It is well with my soul', hauntingly beautiful. Her voice is amazing.