Free will v Destiny

This was the topic of conversation between me and a neighbour on our morning commute yesterday. Its a 15 minute journey so I can't say we really delved into it deeply but before I get into that here's a little background information...

I don't know my neighbour's name, in fact I can't say for sure that he is my neighbour but I assume he lives in the neighbourhood as we have bumped into each other a number of times and he is one of the usual faces I see on my morning commute into work. Mr Neighbour is one of those interesting people you come across in life with whom you tend to have the weirdest conversations. The first time I saw him (a couple of years ago) he stared at my boots, the sweater Uggs, for the entire bus ride..then as we got off asked how I got the smell out when they got damped/soaked in the rain...no hello, no hi...just how do you get them to stop smelling...I smiled and said I hadn't ever noticed them smelling and walked rapidly away. Another time I bumped into him and he started a conversation on home renovations, informing me that he was in the middle of a bathroom renovation, apparently updating the old avocado coloured suite...it was a cold windy wintry day and my eyes began watering...noticing he said he didn't realise I was a huge avocado fan...I must admit I found that funny.

Anyway I bumped into him yesterday and the free will v destiny convo somehow began...I don't know how but I vaguely remember talking about Mills & Boon novels and the concept that it can be argued that they are female empowering in that they depict men being brought down to their knees by women...discussion for another day but rest assured that is not a theory I support and I have read, and not ashamed to admit, I own some old copies of those novels!

So free will v destiny. Mr Neighbour firmly believes or at least implied yesterday that we have absolutely no choice in life but what we operate under is the illusion of free will. I disagree. I accept that to an extent...do not ask me to define how much...but to an extent destiny plays a part in our lives but as humans we make choices and deal with the fall out of those choices. I refuse to accept that we are completely under the mercy of destiny because to me that not only takes away our power to determine our life as we wish it to be but it also helps us cop out and gives us an excuse not to take responsibility for the shitty consequences of the crappy choices we may make and the latter more so than the former is unacceptable to me. There are people in this world who make conscious bad choices and should not be allowed to operate under the notion that they are not responsible for the consequences of said bad choices.

Like I said it was a 15 minute commute so we could not delve deeply into the discussion (or according to other passengers argument) so we decided to shelve it till next time...Mr Neighbour did however leave with the parting shot of calling me an 'existentialist'...haa!!! I think not!!!